why do people say the shit they say?

there can't be anything worse than being on a red-eye and not sleeping. sure, you say, who sleeps on planes anyways? well, i do. something about the electro-static energy with a combination of the "white-noise" and the bad air. as soon as i sit in my seat and buckle my belt, i'm out. and i was. was there drink service? i don't remember. i do remember the lady behind me who just. had. to. read. when everyone else was sleeping and her personal light was not so personal as it shined right into my upturned, uncomfortably positioned face. there has to be some kinda law about that. finally i looked behind her and saw her snoozing and then stealthily shut her light off. i tossed and turned and maybe slept an hour or two.

my seat mate, an older woman, i want to say about mid 50's (i am fairly positive that she was probably younger than that but all the bitterness in her life/attitude it just caused her to look older) was just weird. weird in the sense that she offered up all this extraneous information when asked a simple question. we have the seat empty between us. she has her "brought" pillow propping up her back with the plane pillow. she sits up and fiddles with some kind of fanny pack (yes, fanny pack) and pulls out this piece of equipment. its made of that grayish black plastic that is so popular with computer equipment. its a flat disk connected by a mouse=width cable to a remote control looking device. kinda like when you get a pedicure in the spa chair and you have the remote for the massage controls? i ask her what it is and she says that she has a medical condition, something in her back (i can't remember what she said) and that device is a scrambler. she puts the disk part up to her lower back and presses some buttons and she says it "scrambles" the pain. it doesn't take the pain away, just minimizes it. i said i thought it was a personal back massager. and she was like, oh and you wanted to share it? sorry you have to get a 5-inch gash in your back to get one of these.

huh.

next, i rang the stewardess bell for a blanket, just as they were announcing that all the blankets had been distributed. i made an "aw shucks" gesture and the woman says, oh well i have mine. you're welcome to use it if i don't. i always bring one with me because i have a medical problem with my leg and it gets cold sometimes. and here, she kinda hoists up her left leg, that is extended into the aisle a bit, with the use of her non-existant stomach muscles.

huh.

then the stewardess was trying to move people around so that pretty much everyone had an empty seat in their row. in the row behind me there was a couple and an older woman. the stewardess asked the older woman if she was interested in moving from her window seat to an aisle seat where she would be in a row with only one other person. she said, oh i have breast cancer and i need the window seat to brace my right arm.

huh.

not just, no thank you i'm fine. but rather, i have cancer.

interesting. in the sense that people feel the need to offer up this additional information about themselves to appear more interesting. more exciting. cooler. to ellicit pity. it got me to thinking about all the stuff i extraneously throw out there that people didn't ask for or aren't interested in hearing. i know i have a lot of those cards. i have a whole deck, in fact. i usually bring it along with me on the first couple of dates. and i say dates because i just realized that i don't usually offer this additional information to women. now THAT'S interesting. i'll have to look into that.

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did you know that at SFO you have to pay to use their wireless network at the terminal? that's bullshit. i mean, i can see why the do it but, its still bullshit.

did you know that the airport in charlotte, NC doesn't have a wireless network? not too surprising i guess.

after charlotte, i flew into tampa. i slept the whole way on that plane. an hour and ten minutes of solid i'm-not-noticing-this-armrest-in-my-side sleep. and so deep i was that when they announced the plane was landing i couldn't even open my eyes let alone raise my seatback. just exhausted. i stumbled off the plane and was really, really happy when i was hit with that wave of humidity. you don't get the wet air in san francisco. well, i guess essentially fog is wet air, but its not the same. the heat coupled with water in the air. there is something so magically (and sadly missed) about it. i made my way to the hertz counter for my hyundai elantra.

this is the first time visiting my grandparents in florida, that i am renting a car. they live about an hour north of ft. myers and happily pick me up, providing i do the dutiful grandaughterly thing and book flights that arrive not too early and depart not too late. this time, i had a hard time getting a flight into ft. myers and came through tampa, which is about 1:30 minutes north of my g-rents. for some reason this extra 30 minutes freaks them out. they're always, "DON'T FLY INTO TAMPA!!" so i sucked it up and got a car. i have to say. wow! i felt so grown up in my own rental car, driving on my own, in an area i didn't really know. thank god i impulsed the iTrip, because i was rockin' out to the traditional metal favorites of queensryche, kid rock and judas priest. definitely fitting for this area of the country.

(sidenote, my grandpa's AIM "someone is signing out" sound, sonds lke a giant cow is slamming itself against a metal fence and it keeps scaring the shit out of me.)

i was marveling, how in the tampa airport there were so many coffee options for me. i wanted to get on the road and decided that i would just hit a starbucks on the way. hmmm. yeah. didn't happen. my choices at most every exit were The Waffle House, Cracker Barrell (Cheese) Restaurant, McDonalds and 7-11. finally, i broke down and got a Big Gulp and those mini powdered donuts. and i must say, they have a brand of mini powdered donuts over here where they have revolutionized the "white powder falling all over your clothing" factor. it just doesn't happen with these. they're called Gem.

Gem indeed.