borderline hermit

basically, i'm really good at being a hermit. i get really protective of my down time and i really prefer sitting on my AWESOME sofa and watching movies. what is really scary, tho, is that now that i am retired (aka not working) i have very little interaction with people. ironically, i think i HAVE gone out more in this last week and a half than i have the whole time i've lived here.

my best east-coast-friend-that's-a-guy, paulie, made fun of me because i told him i've been sewing and gardening. he asked if i was 80. (asshole) i said, come on! i like to do that stuff. its like, self-love. i get to think about a lot of stuff and kinda check out which i think is ten times better to check out while creating something than just sitting on my sofa. i told him that i was also working out every morning. he said, forget that...you need to work out your vagina. HAHAHA. i love him. but you know, i just can't go there. i am so not in the mood to deal with another human being on *that* level.

yesterday, i was sewing away...trying to finish this upscale bag i am making and with one little stitch left, BLAMO my machine crapped out. so i took it into the sewing machine repair place..which also fixes vacuum cleaners? the good news is it can be fixed, the timing was off, the bad news is its practially a bazillion dollars. well not that much but when you're retired you gotta scrimp and save AND i won't get it backtil tuesday. crap.

last night i was watching TV and i dozed off on my couch and when i woke up the weirdest movie was on. it was a horror/slasher movie with a really creepy guy as the "monster". so i shut it off and went to bed where i immediately had my own version of a horror/slasher movie. i was sitting in a dining room chair and was talking to someone and then and some guy came to talk to me and i said, "are you gonna (blah)?" and he said, "no i'm going to do THIS!" and he reached around in front of me (he was on my left) and he stabbed me in my ribs on my right side and he held me while he jabbed the knife in and when it was in me, in between my ribs, i felt like hmmm burdened or full or like i was holding my breath. and i looked him in the eyes and we were looking at each other and i was waiting for him to take the knife out and when he did (not only did i feel it scrapping against one of my ribs) but i felt like when you're blowing up a balloon and you've put too much air in and you decide to let some out and it was that strained kind of air release thing that i felt. i know...i'm not explaining this very well. anyways i woke up and felt all scared and (naturally) my right side was aching. then i just curled up into a ball and fell back asleep.

ok...american idol. how much did i laugh out loud when they cut to Bo's family and they all had sunglasses on? i thought Bo sang really bad last night. even tho he sang my all time favorite song, vehicle by the ides of march. that song makes me think about living in sharon, Mass. when i was 15 and my bedroom was in the basement and i would hermit up in there.

what else was i gonna say? bo...knife dream...uh. i forget. ok byeee!